tell me, tell me

I just want to hear him say,
'Everything is going to be okay ...'

a better today,

Ryan had a dentist appointment this morning which means, I'm left with A from 9am to approximately 1030pm ... ekk. But to my surprise,
what started as a rough morning is turning into a better afternoon. A totally skipped his morning nap, most likely because it seems as if Ryan has forgotten how to change A's diaper properly - & by properly I mean - so that when A's napping, he pees in his diaper & not all over his sleeper. Aiden wakes up screaming, I pat his bottom to feel it soaking wet. I get up to change his diaper, anticipating a full one, but his diaper's dry & just his sleeper is wet. Fun. He never went back to sleep.
A spent most of the morning watching HSM3 & he actually ate his lunch today, yay :)
I'm sitting in our bed & A is asleep (in my arms again), but he's only woken up twice since 12:30pm :) Got 8 pages of my paper done, just need to finish up the 'directions for future learning' section & edit, edit, edit.

Here's to hoping the evening is swell!

I'm melting ...

I write this with A in my arms, moaning & diddle-daddling with his eyes closed. He's so tired, but just won't stay asleep.

My frustration levels have reached new highs. My patience is dwindling - I'm starting to think that I'm not cut out for this. I keep telling myself to play it cool, this is just a phase, & this too will pass - eventually. It just seems like later than sooner.
Naptimes never used to be a problem for A. I'll put him down for a nap (in my arms, of course), place him down on our bed when he's fallen asleep & 2 hours later, wakes a happy happy baby. Lately, everytime I leave the room, he wakes up crying, screaming ... I'm at my wits end. Naptimes are god send to me. It's when I complete my homework, wash dishes, tidy up, prepare snacks, complete online tasks, not to mention - revive myself of my sanity. Wishing I could somehow take a break for a moment, maybe for a few hours, or even for a day. But at the same time, I feel like I'm being a bad mama :(

midnight delight

Lately, when A wakes up around this time, we attempt to put him back to sleep (as per usual), but if that doesn't work out - we've been letting him stay up a bit. We change his bum & just quietly watch some TV in bed with A in either my arms or Ry's (although A fights Ry when he's in his arms & would much rather lay in bed with me, such a mama's boy - honestly!). I don't know if it's the 'right' thing to do, but it seems to be working for us! We wake up @ 630 am to a happy, but hungry baby (but when is A not hungry, hehehe).
So now, A is in my arms, Ry is getting ready for bed & we're waiting for CSI to start, feels like my preggo nights, but with a babe :P!

Aiden is so delightful around midnight, xxoo.

my biggest 'project' to date;

So I've been working quite diligently on A's First Year mini album. (Even though I have an 8 page paper on the effectiveness of alcoholism due next Saturday). I'm trying to make the concept / template of the album quite simple (mainly because I have to repeat the steps 12 times), but I'm finding that my brain is jumping the gun & wanting to do so much more with it. I'm going to compose a test template tonight to see just how visually aesthetic it is. The thing that I'm having the most difficulty with is the journaling. I tried, as best I could (being a first time mama usually means the preggo-brain carries on - for at least the first 3 months after delivery) to keep track of the events of A's days. What I should have did was writing along the way, as the months passed us by. But where was the time when I needed it?! ... learning to take care of a newborn, taking online classes for my degree & adjusting to being someone's wife ... LOL. So now I'm 'stuck' with the tedious task of reliving the moment & attempting to jot them down on paper (well, Microsoft Word). Don't get me wrong, the reliving is not the tedious part, but rather the fact that I want to write everything down - want everything to be perfect ... will I ever accept that perfection is next to impossible? I'm making progress though, hoping I'll have something to show for before A actually turns 1! (omg, he's 10 months tomorrow, where has the time gone?)